Over the last few weeks I’ve had quite a few reasons to count my blessings and to feel fortunate. I think many of you who have stumbled upon my post, are aware of the horrible shootings that happened in Seattle recently. I feel anguish for those who have lost people they love. I feel sadness that much of it happened in a neighborhood (and city) that I have spent years living in, one that holds many memories for me and I hold a fondness for. I feel angry that present gun laws and untreated mental illness create a perfect storm for such tragedies to happen so frequently. I feel frustration that this world is so cruel sometimes and I can’t fix it.
The blessings and fortune I speak of are about a few different things. My little boy and the man I love were at one of our favorite parks just 2 blocks away from the cafe that day; cops were everywhere as they were looking for the gunman. That’s too close, but I’m thankful they weren’t closer. A couple of days after that, my boy smacked the back of his head straight into a tree trunk while on a tree swing being pushed by his sister; he came crying into the house with blood streaming down the back of his shirt. I envisioned all kinds of brain injury scenarios during the painfully slow (Friday night rush hour) albeit short trip to the ER. But my boy just had an abrasion and left the hospital with a red popsicle…again, I’m thankful.
Then last Wednesday marked a seven-year anniversary of the passing of someone I loved deeply. So much that the depths of my grief for a long time after his death, which felt so dark and hopeless, made me imagine that nothing and no one would ever bring light into my life ever again. I eventually emerged from that darkest hole to find that I saw life in a whole new way afterwards, and if there’s anything to be thankful for despite losing a love like that, it’s that. And I do have both love and light in my life again.
I took these on June 6th (on that anniversary) and though the day started out grey and felt somber and lonely to me, the sun did come out and there were beautiful sights all around that evening. I hope Seattle will heal from these awful tragedies and that much is learned. I also wish for light and love to come in place of the darkness and loss; Seattle is a beautiful, resilient city full of amazing people, and to see the flowers that cover the sidewalk outside Cafe Racer (photo required, I know!), you can’t help but be moved by the love here.
Now that I have put all that out there to the blogosphere, I have gig and birthday party photos to edit!
xo ~ K
Each day of human life contains joy and anger, pain and pleasure, darkness and light, growth and decay. Each moment is etched with nature’s grand design – do not try to deny or oppose the cosmic order of things. ~Morihei Ueshiba
3 thoughts on “Sadness & Light in Seattle | Reflections”
June 6th, 2005 I lost someone I loved soo much. I feel your pain. As gloomy as it was the days before June 6th, when the sun came out , even for a little bit, i felt his presence, his warmth shining down on me. Not a day in the last 7 years have I not thought of him. Wished he was here with me. Wished my husband knew him better. Wished my sons felt his love and care. Wished they knew an amazing man, who I called dad.
The sun within us has to shine. for us. for the loved ones around us.
At least we have the memories. Memories of great people who touched our lives. As hard as it is to remember, at least we got that. And that’s something that nobody can take away.
Great post. Great pictures. Can’t wait to see more of your wonderful work!
That we share that date in common is amazing. It was a dark dark day and time for me, and within a year of many other losses, setbacks and a MS diagnosis. And then it was a lot of work to make it feel as though my own life worth was living. True we have those memories so that person lives on within us, and I also have his music. And photos! That photos serve to memorialize life’s many moments is something I cherish being able to do. Thank you so much for reading and looking! We shall have to do a photo-walk one day soon.
You’ve been through a lot. You are strong. And I know things will get better. We have to believe that 🙂 – Would love a photo-walk with you! We’ll arrange that soon!